Brainspotting & IFS for Couples Trauma Therapy
In San Francisco, CA
Transform Your Relationship Through Deep Healing
Are you and your partner high achievers who've given everything to career and family while your relationship slowly deteriorated? If you're considering separation but want to explore every option for healing, my specialized combination of Brainspotting and Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy offers a powerful pathway to transformation that goes far beyond traditional talk therapy.
As a trauma-informed therapist specializing in couples on the brink, I help partners address trauma stored not just in their thoughts, but throughout their nervous system and body. This integrated approach is specifically designed for high-performing couples, perfectionists, and those dealing with complex trauma histories who need more than conventional couples therapy.
Why Choose Brainspotting & IFS for Couples Trauma Therapy?
Comprehensive Trauma Processing
Unlike traditional talk therapy that focuses primarily on cognitive understanding, my approach combines Internal Family Systems therapy with Brainspotting therapy to address trauma where it actually lives – in your nervous system, your body, and your internal family of protective parts. This holistic approach creates lasting change rather than temporary behavioral modifications.
Accelerated Healing for Busy Professionals
Through therapy intensives and focused sessions, we can achieve in weeks what might take months in weekly therapy. This concentrated approach is ideal for high-achieving couples who are ready to commit to transformation and need efficient, effective results.
Trauma-Informed Expertise
My compassionate yet pragmatic approach recognizes that relationship struggles often stem from unhealed trauma patterns. Whether you're dealing with infidelity, emotional disconnection, or childhood wounds affecting your partnership, this specialized therapy work addresses root causes rather than surface symptoms.
How Internal Family Systems Therapy Transforms Relationships
Internal Family Systems therapy, developed by Richard Schwartz, helps you understand and heal the different parts within you – the inner critic, the achiever, the protector, the wounded child. For high-performing couples, certain parts often dominate while others remain wounded and exiled.
Through IFS therapy, you'll learn to:
Identify which parts show up during conflict
Access your compassionate core Self during difficult conversations
Understand your partner's protective strategies as trauma responses rather than personal attacks
Develop empathy for both your own and your partner's internal struggles
Unburden exiles carrying old wounds that interfere with intimacy
This Internal Family Systems work helps couples move from reactive patterns into conscious, loving connection. When you can recognize "a part of me feels threatened" rather than "you're attacking me," everything changes.
The Power of Brainspotting Therapy for Couples
Brainspotting therapy uses specific eye positioning to access and process trauma stored in your brain and body. This somatic approach is particularly effective for high achievers who are used to thinking their way through problems but find that cognitive strategies aren't enough to heal relationship wounds.
During Brainspotting work, I help you:
Locate the neurobiological patterns that drive reactive responses
Process trauma stored in your nervous system through targeted eye positioning
Release physical tension and activation that blocks intimacy
Develop greater emotional regulation and presence in your relationship
Feel more grounded and less hijacked by emotional triggers
Unlike traditional talk therapy, Brainspotting therapy helps you feel immediate shifts in how your body responds to relationship stress, creating space for genuine vulnerability and connection.
What to Expect in Combined IFS and Brainspotting Sessions
Each therapy session is personalized to your unique needs and current emotional state. My goal is creating a safe environment where both neurobiological healing and internal parts work can unfold naturally.
Individual Processing Within Couples Work
We begin each session by identifying which parts of you are activated: perhaps anxiety about a recent conflict, or protective strategies that are blocking intimacy. The therapist helps you feel grounded before diving into deeper work.
Targeted Trauma Release
Using Brainspotting therapy, we locate the eye positioning that corresponds to emotional or physical sensations you're experiencing. This allows your brain's natural healing mechanisms to process trauma stored in your nervous system while maintaining awareness of your internal family systems.
Real-Time Integration
Unlike weekly therapy sessions where insights might fade between appointments, this intensive approach allows immediate integration of healing. As trauma patterns shift through Brainspotting work, we explore how this impacts your relationship dynamics in real-time.
Practical Application
Each session concludes with reflection and personalized homework assignments that help you practice staying connected to your Self while engaging your parts in relationship-supportive ways.
Deep Healing Couples Intensives: Accelerated Transformation
For couples ready to make significant changes quickly, I offer Deep Healing Couples Intensives that combine IFS & Brainspotting work in concentrated formats. These therapy intensives are designed for high-achieving couples facing critical relationship decisions who need accelerated healing.
Why Choose Therapy Intensives?
Focused Time for Deep Work: Rather than spending months in weekly therapy making incremental progress, intensive sessions allow you to address core issues without daily life interruptions pulling your attention away from healing.
Breakthrough Moments: The concentrated format often creates breakthrough moments that might take months to achieve in traditional weekly sessions. When trauma patterns shift through this intensive approach, the changes feel both profound and sustainable.
Efficient for Busy Professionals: Therapy intensives respect your time constraints while providing the depth needed for lasting transformation. You can achieve significant progress in days rather than months.
Intensive Session Structure
Pre-Intensive Preparation: Every intensive begins with a comprehensive workbook and consultation to ensure both partners are on the same page and ready for deep therapy work.
Personalized Sessions: Whether you choose concentrated days or extended formats, each intensive session is customized to your trauma history, relationship patterns, and healing goals.
Post-Intensive Integration: Follow-up combined sessions help integrate insights and develop sustainable practices for maintaining your progress.
The Transformation Process: From Trauma to Thriving
Phase 1: Understanding Your Internal Landscape
Through Internal Family Systems therapy, you'll develop awareness of your protective parts and wounded exiles. The therapist helps you identify patterns that may have served you professionally but create distance in your relationship.
Phase 2: Releasing Stored Trauma
Brainspotting therapy helps discharge nervous system activation that keeps your parts in protective mode. As trauma stored in your body releases, you'll feel more present and available for genuine connection.
Phase 3: Integration and Application
We focus on applying your new awareness to daily life, creating communication patterns that honor both your parts and your partner's, while staying connected to your compassionate core Self.
Benefits Specific to High-Achieving Couples
Enhanced Communication: Move beyond conflict management to authentic, vulnerable sharing that deepens intimacy.
Reduced Reactivity: Learn to respond consciously rather than react automatically to emotional triggers.
Improved Emotional Regulation: Develop powerful tools for staying present during difficult conversations.
Deeper Understanding: Recognize that your partner's difficult behaviors often stem from wounded parts rather than malicious intent.
Renewed Intimacy: As trauma patterns heal and parts learn to trust, rediscover your capacity for physical and emotional closeness.
Professional Growth: The self-awareness gained through this work naturally enhances your leadership and professional relationships.
Benefits Specific to High-Achieving Couples
Enhanced Communication: Move beyond conflict management to authentic, vulnerable sharing that deepens intimacy.
Reduced Reactivity: Learn to respond consciously rather than react automatically to emotional triggers.
Improved Emotional Regulation: Develop powerful tools for staying present during difficult conversations.
Deeper Understanding: Recognize that your partner's difficult behaviors often stem from wounded parts rather than malicious intent.
Renewed Intimacy: As trauma patterns heal and parts learn to trust, rediscover your capacity for physical and emotional closeness.
Professional Growth: The self-awareness gained through this work naturally enhances your leadership and professional relationships.
Why This Approach Works When Others Haven't
Many couples come to me after years of traditional talk therapy that provided insight but didn't create lasting change. The combination of Internal Family Systems and Brainspotting therapy reaches deeper layers of trauma that cognitive approaches alone cannot access.
This holistic approach recognizes that relationship struggles often stem from:
Nervous system dysregulation that drives reactive responses
Protective parts developed in response to past trauma
Unprocessed wounds stored in the body
Patterns learned in childhood that no longer serve your adult relationship
By addressing all these levels simultaneously, couples experience transformation that feels both profound and sustainable.
My Approach: Compassionate Yet Pragmatic
I bring a directive but kind methodology to this work, combining trauma-informed expertise with practical solutions. My vibrant, interactive style helps couples feel engaged and hopeful while doing deep healing work. I can hold space for trauma and pain while also providing the solution-focused guidance that high achievers appreciate.
Between sessions, I provide:
Personalized homework assignments to support continued growth
Availability for brief check-ins when you need support navigating challenging moments
Optional AI note-taking services to help track your progress and insights
Ready to Transform Your Relationship?
If you're a high-achieving couple ready to move beyond relationship management strategies into genuine transformation, this integrated approach offers proven powerful tools for healing. Whether you're dealing with infidelity, years of emotional disconnection, or childhood trauma affecting your partnership, lasting change is possible when you address trauma at its roots.
The question isn't whether your relationship can heal – it's whether you're ready to do the deep therapy work that makes transformation possible.
Take the First Step
Your healing journey begins with a complimentary consultation call where we'll explore:
Your relationship challenges and trauma history
How this integrated approach might help your specific situation
Whether we're a good therapeutic fit
Current availability for individual sessions or therapy intensives
During this call, I'll provide a transparent assessment of whether this work can help your unique situation. You'll leave feeling informed and confident about your next steps.
Ready to rebuild the intimate, connected relationship you both deserve?
Contact me today to schedule your consultation and discover how Brainspotting & IFS for couples trauma therapy can transform your relationship from surviving to thriving.
Serving couples throughout San Francisco, CA and online. Specialized in working with high-achieving partners, perfectionists, and those considering separation who want to explore every option for healing.